i've loved you so long.

i have been feeling very cheerful for the past few days.

so cheerful in fact, that i have neglected my posts.

and in keeping with my high spirits, no complaints today.

this afternoon, i saw a film that was so profoundly moving that i just had to tell the world. il y a longtemps que je t'aime is the directorial debut of philippe claudel and features a performance by kristin scott thomas that is so sublimely acted you have to see it to believe it.

thomas plays juliette, a woman having just been released from prison after serving a fifteen-year sentence for the murder of her six-year-old son. with no other family or friends willing to speak to her (given the nature of her crime), she moves in temporarily with her sister lea (played brilliantly by elsa zylberstein), a university professor with two adorable adopted vietnamese daughters, a soccer-enthusiast husband and his mute father. 

(normally, i hate it when casting directors deliberately search for child actors that are so nauseatingly sweet and cute, as i feel it ruins the reality of the picture, but these two were a unique breath of fresh air). 

the sense of closeness and actuality that exudes from the typically quirky french family is turned upside down when this former criminal is brought into the picture, particularly for the puzzled young girls who have a lot of questions for this aunt that they never knew existed. what is so phenomenal about this picture is thomas' dedication to the character, who says very little throughout the film and wanders about in a haunted near-existence, with a face completely careworn and so heartbreakingly sad, it alone should have won her a much deserved academy award.

(mind you, sally hawkins' performance in  happy go lucky garnered her just about every major award of the 2008 season - - los angeles film critics association: best actress ; berlin film festival: silver bear award for best actress ; boston film festival: best actress ; new york film critics circle award: best actress ; golden globe award: best actress in a musical or comedy - - and even she was no match for angelina jolie's pathetic and heavily lobbied nomination for changeling. many great female performances in 2008, and very few of them actually appeared at the oscars).

juliette is slowly regaining the trust and love of the few people who know of her past. she maintains a job as a medical secretary (as she was a doctor before her son's death), buys her own apartment and ultimately meets a man to whom she tells her secret.

the impending climax comes nearer the end when we discover the exact circumstances of her crime. a photo and letter written by her son is accidently left on a bedside table, and eventually found by lea. on the back of the letter is a medical formula (written by the former doctor juliette) for a type of euthanasia which she administered to her son to end the constant pain he was suffering from a terminal illness. all along, everyone had assumed that she had poisoned her son deliberately, when she merely helped to humanely put him to sleep. she never told anybody the truth, even at her trial, because as she says: 

"the death of a child is worse than a prison. you live in it every day. i wanted to go to jail".

the film ends here and there wasn't a dry eye in the house.

i watched it alone, but you get the idea.

a phenomenal performance by an incredibly underrated (and surprisingly french) actress. bravo ms. thomas.

it almost makes you wonder why her next co-star is jessica biel.

now that's versatility.